We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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