So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
