Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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