I intend to get homeless drunk
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
