Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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