once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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