I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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