I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
