operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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