It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Randomize
