it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
