No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
