It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
