she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
dude. I can hear the air.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize