p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
