She said her name was "party"
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
