Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
