I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
