Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
