Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.