i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
