the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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