ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize