i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
