idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Randomize
