North Korea, Best Korea!
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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