do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
