Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
