Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
