I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize