I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
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I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
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This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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