he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
