Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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