so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
