My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Who died my cat blue again?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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