my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
