You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
