So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
