Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
