woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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