At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
