My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
