Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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