is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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