I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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