So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
