Texts From Last Night

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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...

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  (918): My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it... http://tfl.nu/dlfs
  Replies (1) Good night (950) Bad night (4595)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!

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  (352): redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull! http://tfl.nu/8te0
  Replies (34) Good night (4437) Bad night (657)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator

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  (781): the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator http://tfl.nu/8mwn
  Replies (32) Good night (12192) Bad night (1349)
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  (435): View more from Utah

  She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.

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  (435): She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life. http://tfl.nu/8hnp
  Replies (29) Good night (7088) Bad night (1145)
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  (209): View more from California

  nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw

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  (209): nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw http://tfl.nu/vicw
  Replies (74) Good night (5165) Bad night (1455)
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..

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  (228): He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room.. http://tfl.nu/jg6e
  Replies (2) Good night (905) Bad night (1783)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.

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  (902): figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it. http://tfl.nu/pdw3
  Replies (5) Good night (618) Bad night (1271)
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  (415): View more from California

  Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.

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  (415): Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store. http://tfl.nu/kxjk
  Replies (8) Good night (2425) Bad night (557)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show

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  (719): Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show http://tfl.nu/2ff1
  Replies (4) Good night (940) Bad night (625)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me

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  (614): It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me http://tfl.nu/sahk
  Replies (19) Good night (2000) Bad night (648)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.

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  (443): The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts. http://tfl.nu/2k5o
  Replies (1) Good night (511) Bad night (959)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.

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  (902): Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends. http://tfl.nu/0yi1
  Replies (12) Good night (2427) Bad night (538)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.

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  (281): I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot. http://tfl.nu/j0eg
  Replies (2) Good night (502) Bad night (391)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck

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  (770): Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck http://tfl.nu/dtrp
  Replies (4) Good night (522) Bad night (323)
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  (707): View more from California

  You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation

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  (707): You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation http://tfl.nu/8r16
  Replies (0) Good night (598) Bad night (291)

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