We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
