tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
