As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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