yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
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