i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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